Panic Attacks
Panic attack is nothing new. According to some astounding research results, it has been proved that more that about 100 million residents of the United States have suffered from at least one panic attack at some point in their life. Now, this estimates to nearly about one-third of American population in the United States.
There are several reasons why this may be so. It is said that most frequent panic attacks sufferers may have jobs that are physically or mentally challenging,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, leading to a lot of stress. In a situation where one requires to deal with good amount of stress levels, the efficacy to pull away from the environment or situation and take some rest is lost.
This makes the body travel in to an overdrive situation. It is a condition that can result is overheating of an individual,How to Avoid Being Old by Barbara Morris. This situation is quite similar to one where a car gets heated up. This over heating develops a form of panic attack in an individual,but simply learn how to shield out pessimistic comments or suggestions..
The heart tends to race and palm grows sweaty. There is a general feeling of sadness experienced by the individual that forces him or her back from what he or she was indulged in. The sufferer is unable to take a breather. This is the reason that a person under highly stressed situation is asked to take rest for some time.
Apart from the type of jobs one is indulged in a lot of personality traits in an individual are also known to be responsible for a panic attack,or would you be hurting somebody's feelings by saying "no". When you put yourself first.
People with a quality to analyze a lot tend to be obsessive and emotionally sensitive. They also require to be under control 24x7 and are more vulnerable to go through a panic attack.
These people are known to focus more on a single issue and once the issue is no more under their control, they may freak out and the whole thing results in a panic attack.
People suffering from irrational phobias such as fear of spiders, heights or others are also more vulnerable to panic attacks. These phobias are known to arise from negative encounters with specific elements in the past.
Panic attacks are known to arise from high anxiety. These attacks are not hereditary. Many researches have proved that these attacks develop in an anxious environment. However, in general the development of this disorder is contributed by isolation.
Major changes in life such as marriage, graduating from school and college, divorce, death of a loved one, failure in job etc may also result in panic attack.
Here are som other reasons:
Childhood trauma
Abandonment
Neglect
Loss of parent due to death
Loss of parent due to divorce
Phobias
Overactive thyroid
Post traumatic stress
Hypoglycemia
Depression
Other mood related disorders
Financial insecurity
Use of alcohol
Use of certain medication
Over usage of caffeine
Life full of high stress
Drug abuse
Friday, November 30, 2012
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Coming to Believe vs. Deciding
What Being Vs Doing Really Means
So often we hear about "being" rather than "doing,Answer every question on multiple choice tests." Often it's given as advice when we are overwhelmed, overworked and overstressed. "You should just be.' You're doing too much." Well, yes, obviously,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, but what does that MEAN,period.? How do we just be?
I happen to think the people saying this don't even really know what it means and are just giving it as a platitude,which is, trying to help, but it doesn't help if you don't know how to implement it.
Here are some ways in which being is different from doing.
Hearing vs. Listening
If I really "hear" you, I understand what you're saying and, more importantly, what you're not saying. I grasp the full import of your words and silences. I'm not just listening with one ear. I'm really getting you.
Learning vs. Studying
I can study all day long, but if at the end of the day all I really know is what's going to be on the test, it doesn't do me much good. Learning is about absorbing what's being taught. Once I've learned something, I don't need to study it the next time.
Coming to Believe vs. Deciding
Decisions can be arrived at two ways—by coming to believe this is the right course, or by "deciding" this is the right course. You've heard the term "executive decision." Often that means I've just decided something without reference to any outside sources or even to what I really think. By coming to believe something, I've made an authentic, informed decision.
Realizing vs. Jumping to Conclusions
It's easy to "jump to conclusions" and just know something is true. Really knowing it's true, from a centered, authentic place in your heart and not just in your head, is more difficult. It's also the best way to reach the truth.
Being Effective vs. Being Efficient
Being effective means getting the right things done in the right way. Being efficient means getting the most things done in the least time. Obviously there is some advantage to getting things done in less time, but it's absolutely crucial that this should be done in the most EFFECTIVE way.
As you can see, Being vs. Doing is actually about what you're doing and how you're doing it. Initially it might sound like just sitting around, but it's a very active process.
So often we hear about "being" rather than "doing,Answer every question on multiple choice tests." Often it's given as advice when we are overwhelmed, overworked and overstressed. "You should just be.' You're doing too much." Well, yes, obviously,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, but what does that MEAN,period.? How do we just be?
I happen to think the people saying this don't even really know what it means and are just giving it as a platitude,which is, trying to help, but it doesn't help if you don't know how to implement it.
Here are some ways in which being is different from doing.
Hearing vs. Listening
If I really "hear" you, I understand what you're saying and, more importantly, what you're not saying. I grasp the full import of your words and silences. I'm not just listening with one ear. I'm really getting you.
Learning vs. Studying
I can study all day long, but if at the end of the day all I really know is what's going to be on the test, it doesn't do me much good. Learning is about absorbing what's being taught. Once I've learned something, I don't need to study it the next time.
Coming to Believe vs. Deciding
Decisions can be arrived at two ways—by coming to believe this is the right course, or by "deciding" this is the right course. You've heard the term "executive decision." Often that means I've just decided something without reference to any outside sources or even to what I really think. By coming to believe something, I've made an authentic, informed decision.
Realizing vs. Jumping to Conclusions
It's easy to "jump to conclusions" and just know something is true. Really knowing it's true, from a centered, authentic place in your heart and not just in your head, is more difficult. It's also the best way to reach the truth.
Being Effective vs. Being Efficient
Being effective means getting the right things done in the right way. Being efficient means getting the most things done in the least time. Obviously there is some advantage to getting things done in less time, but it's absolutely crucial that this should be done in the most EFFECTIVE way.
As you can see, Being vs. Doing is actually about what you're doing and how you're doing it. Initially it might sound like just sitting around, but it's a very active process.
Friday, November 23, 2012
The Common Mistakes Made By A Job Seeker by Lubowa Planet
HOW TO EASILY GET A JOB: The Common Mistakes Made By A Job Seeker by Lubowa Planet
Would you like to learn how you can easily get a job?
Imagine finishing your university studies completely confident and prepared for the job market---
Knowing all that will be required of you as a job seeker.
Now I want you to imagine being completely in control of the outcome of your job search activities and landing the job of your dreams, which will make you happy and comfortable...Sound too good to be true?
After you read this short article, you will feel like your fears of never getting a job are almost completely solved, all you will have to do is to go out and get one.
Right off the butt, I want to tell you that getting a job is as easy as mastering the English alphabet,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. However, it makes me sad whenever I see a bright individual blundering his chances of getting a job by committing mistakes that can be easily avoided.
MYTH: Most job seekers think they can get the job just because they're good at what they do.
FACT: Wrong! The jobseeker that knows how to present his CV, use the CV to effectively search for that job and how to act during an interview and answer questions well will get the job!
So what does this imply, it implies that the process of getting a job boils down to three things namely, Writing a good CV, using the most effective job search methods and mastering the art of interviews. What are the common mistakes you are bound to commit as a job seeker?
1. Writing a poor CV,with a new boss.
These days' employers often receive a lot of CVs for advertised and not advertised jobs. Jobs advertised in national papers can often attract hundreds of applicants. So your CV has to be just that little bit special to stand out if you want to obtain interviews.
Your CV is a very important document; with it rest your hopes and dreams for the future -that next step up the career ladder, a better position, more money, new challenges, etc. Your CV therefore has to represent the best you have to offer if you do not want to miss out on that job you saw advertised or heard of which was 'perfect' for you.
However, most job seekers spend a lot of time, effort and some times money, to write a very good CV. When they are through with the writing bit, they then make several copies, which they will attach to each and every Job application they send out. This is a very grave mistake. You should never do this. Each Job you apply for, you should send a customized CV. A CV that is tailored to the requirements of that particular position. In the book titled "How To Easily Get Jobs-Interview Questions And Their Right Answers Exposed", The four different types of CVs are shown with guidelines on how to write each particular CV and when to submit which CV. Plus the 15 thing that you should never include in your CV.
If you have customized your CV but doesn't seem to have the impact you wanted and you're not getting many interviews, then you should consider the following mistakes you might be committing: Are you aiming for jobs that you aren't qualified for? Does your CV meet the requirements of an advertisement? Are you older/younger than the stated age range on the advertisement? If you can see no reason why you have been rejected then you should look again carefully at your CV, as this must be the culprit.
2. Using Poor Job Search strategies.
Once you have prepared your CV you are ready to start looking for a job .In Uganda today, there are essentially four ways to find a job. The mistake that most graduate Job seekers do is to use only one method of job hunting. There preferred method is that of submitting application for jobs advertise in newspapers, radio and other print media. However, Over 67% of opportunities in any country are not advertised in the above media. So you should be able to use a method that will help you to uncover the 67% of unadvertised jobs. This method is called "Networking" and is extensively written about in many books including that written by me. In other words, To easily get a job, you will need to use more than two method of job searching. Faster results will be achieved when you use the four method of job searching.
3,So what does this have to do with eagles. Not Being Specific:
Most job seekers prolong their unemployment period because they lack vision. They do not know what they want. Though a few people have succeeded in getting a job when they just requested for any job, the majority of applications that request for any job will end up in the dustbin, never to be seen again.
You should not just apply for any job, ask for a particular Job. "What Job Do I want?" You should ask your self the question before you start hunting for the job. If you need help in reviewing your career plans you can get advice from 'Careers Service. These can be found at most departments at the various schools, institutions and Universities. It is important to have thought through the types of job/career you are seeking. This will help you identify potential employers and target your applications by presenting clearly what you have to offer.
4. Minimal interview skills by the candidate:
Many job seekers I have worked on have confided in me that even though they eagerly wait for the interview appointment to come in, they also hate the night proceeding to it. This is because they are not sure of what their performance at the interviews will be. Answering job interviews is an art that is perfected with preparation, practice and repetition. However, job seekers make a mistake of coming for the interview unprepared and not knowing what to expect.
Before you go for an interview, find out everything you can about the company by reading their annual report if they have one,Go to the audition or stay home. Re-read your application, thinking through your own career and the questions they might ask you. You should try to anticipate the general questions which they will ask and also prepare some questions to ask them.
To do well at the interview, you will need to convince the interviewer you are technically qualified to do the job. You will also need to show that you are sufficiently motivated to get the job done well and that you will fit in with the company's organizational structure and the team in which you will work.
You should dress smartly for the interview and should leave home earlier than you need to on the day of the interview - you may be delayed by traffic or for other reasons. Be courteous to all employees of the company. At the interview itself you must be positive about yourself and your abilities - but do not make a mistake to waffle.
In the book "How To easily Get Jobs-Interview Questions And Their Right Answers Exposed", You are shown secret techniques, tactics and strategies that you should use to out perform your completion and ACE any job interview. It has over 150 common questions asked at job interview, with the most excellent answer in response to the questions. These questions are a good resource for any one preparing for any job interview.
Well, those are some of the mistakes that are committed during job seeking and I have shown you how you can avoid them so as to easily get a job. For even more information, I recommend that you get your self a copy of the Book titled" How To Easily Get Jobs-Interview Questions And Their Right Answers Exposed"
Would you like to learn how you can easily get a job?
Imagine finishing your university studies completely confident and prepared for the job market---
Knowing all that will be required of you as a job seeker.
Now I want you to imagine being completely in control of the outcome of your job search activities and landing the job of your dreams, which will make you happy and comfortable...Sound too good to be true?
After you read this short article, you will feel like your fears of never getting a job are almost completely solved, all you will have to do is to go out and get one.
Right off the butt, I want to tell you that getting a job is as easy as mastering the English alphabet,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. However, it makes me sad whenever I see a bright individual blundering his chances of getting a job by committing mistakes that can be easily avoided.
MYTH: Most job seekers think they can get the job just because they're good at what they do.
FACT: Wrong! The jobseeker that knows how to present his CV, use the CV to effectively search for that job and how to act during an interview and answer questions well will get the job!
So what does this imply, it implies that the process of getting a job boils down to three things namely, Writing a good CV, using the most effective job search methods and mastering the art of interviews. What are the common mistakes you are bound to commit as a job seeker?
1. Writing a poor CV,with a new boss.
These days' employers often receive a lot of CVs for advertised and not advertised jobs. Jobs advertised in national papers can often attract hundreds of applicants. So your CV has to be just that little bit special to stand out if you want to obtain interviews.
Your CV is a very important document; with it rest your hopes and dreams for the future -that next step up the career ladder, a better position, more money, new challenges, etc. Your CV therefore has to represent the best you have to offer if you do not want to miss out on that job you saw advertised or heard of which was 'perfect' for you.
However, most job seekers spend a lot of time, effort and some times money, to write a very good CV. When they are through with the writing bit, they then make several copies, which they will attach to each and every Job application they send out. This is a very grave mistake. You should never do this. Each Job you apply for, you should send a customized CV. A CV that is tailored to the requirements of that particular position. In the book titled "How To Easily Get Jobs-Interview Questions And Their Right Answers Exposed", The four different types of CVs are shown with guidelines on how to write each particular CV and when to submit which CV. Plus the 15 thing that you should never include in your CV.
If you have customized your CV but doesn't seem to have the impact you wanted and you're not getting many interviews, then you should consider the following mistakes you might be committing: Are you aiming for jobs that you aren't qualified for? Does your CV meet the requirements of an advertisement? Are you older/younger than the stated age range on the advertisement? If you can see no reason why you have been rejected then you should look again carefully at your CV, as this must be the culprit.
2. Using Poor Job Search strategies.
Once you have prepared your CV you are ready to start looking for a job .In Uganda today, there are essentially four ways to find a job. The mistake that most graduate Job seekers do is to use only one method of job hunting. There preferred method is that of submitting application for jobs advertise in newspapers, radio and other print media. However, Over 67% of opportunities in any country are not advertised in the above media. So you should be able to use a method that will help you to uncover the 67% of unadvertised jobs. This method is called "Networking" and is extensively written about in many books including that written by me. In other words, To easily get a job, you will need to use more than two method of job searching. Faster results will be achieved when you use the four method of job searching.
3,So what does this have to do with eagles. Not Being Specific:
Most job seekers prolong their unemployment period because they lack vision. They do not know what they want. Though a few people have succeeded in getting a job when they just requested for any job, the majority of applications that request for any job will end up in the dustbin, never to be seen again.
You should not just apply for any job, ask for a particular Job. "What Job Do I want?" You should ask your self the question before you start hunting for the job. If you need help in reviewing your career plans you can get advice from 'Careers Service. These can be found at most departments at the various schools, institutions and Universities. It is important to have thought through the types of job/career you are seeking. This will help you identify potential employers and target your applications by presenting clearly what you have to offer.
4. Minimal interview skills by the candidate:
Many job seekers I have worked on have confided in me that even though they eagerly wait for the interview appointment to come in, they also hate the night proceeding to it. This is because they are not sure of what their performance at the interviews will be. Answering job interviews is an art that is perfected with preparation, practice and repetition. However, job seekers make a mistake of coming for the interview unprepared and not knowing what to expect.
Before you go for an interview, find out everything you can about the company by reading their annual report if they have one,Go to the audition or stay home. Re-read your application, thinking through your own career and the questions they might ask you. You should try to anticipate the general questions which they will ask and also prepare some questions to ask them.
To do well at the interview, you will need to convince the interviewer you are technically qualified to do the job. You will also need to show that you are sufficiently motivated to get the job done well and that you will fit in with the company's organizational structure and the team in which you will work.
You should dress smartly for the interview and should leave home earlier than you need to on the day of the interview - you may be delayed by traffic or for other reasons. Be courteous to all employees of the company. At the interview itself you must be positive about yourself and your abilities - but do not make a mistake to waffle.
In the book "How To easily Get Jobs-Interview Questions And Their Right Answers Exposed", You are shown secret techniques, tactics and strategies that you should use to out perform your completion and ACE any job interview. It has over 150 common questions asked at job interview, with the most excellent answer in response to the questions. These questions are a good resource for any one preparing for any job interview.
Well, those are some of the mistakes that are committed during job seeking and I have shown you how you can avoid them so as to easily get a job. For even more information, I recommend that you get your self a copy of the Book titled" How To Easily Get Jobs-Interview Questions And Their Right Answers Exposed"
Thursday, November 22, 2012
now do you remember the movies in the mind
Go Ahead Settle For Less
Why should you settle for less? For that matter, why would anyone settle for less? That is a tough question, and even though some people choose to settle for less,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, you do not have to be one of them. Let me see what we can do about moving yourselves out of the crowd at the bottom. Do you remember the 1% club? That's were you just better yourself 1% than the rest of the world and you are assured of being a winner.
If it was so easy, why no one has everything they want. The answer to that is this, most people would rather do anything but think and this is there down fall! What do you think Napoleon Hill book that sold millions, is called "Think and Grow Rich? Kind of makes you wonder does not it. Why would 10% of the people of the world control 90% of the world's money? That is simple they are not afraid to THINK, while the rest of you are settling, getting drunk, instead of thinking. Go to the movies for five straight days instead of reading a helpful book on self-improvement.
Bob Proctor has a saying and it goes like this why worry what the neighbors think. Doesn't worry about what the neighbors think they DON'T? It has a know fact to the human race that if given the chance to quit your job and become indigently wealthy by working for yourself, which anyone can do. They would rather work for a check instead of organizing their thoughts.
God forbid that you would actually use your brain for something rather than watching playboy channel and wondering why your wife does not look that good! I am telling you just remove yourself from the crowd at the bottom and put one foot in front of they other and soon you will be walking through the door.
One word of caution, the people at the bottom have settled for less and they hate to anyone get ahead of you! So don't settle for less than the best and remember that it only takes 1% to raise yourself out of the crowd at t he bottom and then you can be one of the 10% that controls 90% of the worlds wealth, how do we achieve this you may be asking yourself.
Simple don't settle, go to a seminar,It works like a charm. Before you do this exercise, learn about wealth from anyone who will teach you, read books on successful people and use there gold nuggets that they leave behind and if you are willing to sustain your thinking the world is really unlimited.
Now I know what you are thinking, not this I can do anything crap again. Well yes, I will say it again, DO NOT SETTLE! NEVER EVER SETTLE! I was listening to my Zig Ziglars tape series how to stay motivated and he was telling a story of how this guy broke his neck in an accident. Could not move any thing but his eye lids, his sister set up a plan so they could communicate.
By blinking his eyes they would talk back and forth, he could not even breath on his own, not even swallow, they said he was not going to make it and if he did he would be a vegetable. Guess what, three month latter, he walked out of the hospital on his own to legs and now goes bear hunting, fishing and he has even learned how to be a pilot. How you maybe asking yourself? As W Clement Stone said, what a mind could conceive it can achieve.
They ask this man how he did it. He says that listening to Zig Ziglar had a big affect on him, but the thing that stands out the most was the fact that, the doctors were basing everything on things they could test and there test looked pretty bleak.
Now what was it for this amazing come back from the brink of death? He simply said he saw himself in his mind from the first say he could remember, he said to himself someday I'll walk again,Now that you have your list of old goals and dreams, now do you remember the movies in the mind? Do you still think it is make believe? You are just settling niot. Now he knew he was going to recover, he said the Drs. Based everything on what they knew and he based everything on his will to get better and in 90 short days he walked out that hospital and has lived an exceptional life!
How,diverse project through the input of several unique viewpoints., he did not settle, when all the rest of us would have given up and died, he said not me I belong to the 1% club and he by faith raised himself above the rest of the crowd, and guess what? He travels around the country and tells his story to anyone who will listen and now he is rich and he is part of the 10% that controls 90% of the worlds wealth, I asked you again how? HE DID NOT SETTLE, and you my fiend should choose to sustain your thinking on what you want and don't settle and you too can reach to the top.
Why should you settle for less? For that matter, why would anyone settle for less? That is a tough question, and even though some people choose to settle for less,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, you do not have to be one of them. Let me see what we can do about moving yourselves out of the crowd at the bottom. Do you remember the 1% club? That's were you just better yourself 1% than the rest of the world and you are assured of being a winner.
If it was so easy, why no one has everything they want. The answer to that is this, most people would rather do anything but think and this is there down fall! What do you think Napoleon Hill book that sold millions, is called "Think and Grow Rich? Kind of makes you wonder does not it. Why would 10% of the people of the world control 90% of the world's money? That is simple they are not afraid to THINK, while the rest of you are settling, getting drunk, instead of thinking. Go to the movies for five straight days instead of reading a helpful book on self-improvement.
Bob Proctor has a saying and it goes like this why worry what the neighbors think. Doesn't worry about what the neighbors think they DON'T? It has a know fact to the human race that if given the chance to quit your job and become indigently wealthy by working for yourself, which anyone can do. They would rather work for a check instead of organizing their thoughts.
God forbid that you would actually use your brain for something rather than watching playboy channel and wondering why your wife does not look that good! I am telling you just remove yourself from the crowd at the bottom and put one foot in front of they other and soon you will be walking through the door.
One word of caution, the people at the bottom have settled for less and they hate to anyone get ahead of you! So don't settle for less than the best and remember that it only takes 1% to raise yourself out of the crowd at t he bottom and then you can be one of the 10% that controls 90% of the worlds wealth, how do we achieve this you may be asking yourself.
Simple don't settle, go to a seminar,It works like a charm. Before you do this exercise, learn about wealth from anyone who will teach you, read books on successful people and use there gold nuggets that they leave behind and if you are willing to sustain your thinking the world is really unlimited.
Now I know what you are thinking, not this I can do anything crap again. Well yes, I will say it again, DO NOT SETTLE! NEVER EVER SETTLE! I was listening to my Zig Ziglars tape series how to stay motivated and he was telling a story of how this guy broke his neck in an accident. Could not move any thing but his eye lids, his sister set up a plan so they could communicate.
By blinking his eyes they would talk back and forth, he could not even breath on his own, not even swallow, they said he was not going to make it and if he did he would be a vegetable. Guess what, three month latter, he walked out of the hospital on his own to legs and now goes bear hunting, fishing and he has even learned how to be a pilot. How you maybe asking yourself? As W Clement Stone said, what a mind could conceive it can achieve.
They ask this man how he did it. He says that listening to Zig Ziglar had a big affect on him, but the thing that stands out the most was the fact that, the doctors were basing everything on things they could test and there test looked pretty bleak.
Now what was it for this amazing come back from the brink of death? He simply said he saw himself in his mind from the first say he could remember, he said to himself someday I'll walk again,Now that you have your list of old goals and dreams, now do you remember the movies in the mind? Do you still think it is make believe? You are just settling niot. Now he knew he was going to recover, he said the Drs. Based everything on what they knew and he based everything on his will to get better and in 90 short days he walked out that hospital and has lived an exceptional life!
How,diverse project through the input of several unique viewpoints., he did not settle, when all the rest of us would have given up and died, he said not me I belong to the 1% club and he by faith raised himself above the rest of the crowd, and guess what? He travels around the country and tells his story to anyone who will listen and now he is rich and he is part of the 10% that controls 90% of the worlds wealth, I asked you again how? HE DID NOT SETTLE, and you my fiend should choose to sustain your thinking on what you want and don't settle and you too can reach to the top.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
quite the opposite is true. Wouldn't you agree
The Default Setting,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots
In the coaching relationships I have with our clients, the major problem I see is that individuals end up in the same place - over and over and over again. They mean to save money and build wealth, only to end up (again) with "too much month at the end of the money." They've lost the same 15 pounds 8 times in the last decade. They quit one job only to end up doing the exact same job with the exact same pay for a different company. They end a relationship and then start dating the same person with a different name. Sound familiar? Everyone has patterns and they are determined by what we refer to as the "default setting".
The "default setting" in anything is simply is where you end up if you don't take purposeful action. When you turn on your computer, the exact same image pops up on your screen every time,the real key to dealing with problems that challenge us daily while seeking peace, right? That's because your computer has what are actually called "default settings" that it reverts back to every single time,phone numbers of friends or family, no exceptions. The only way to change the image that pops up on that screen is to purposely go in and change the default setting. You have a default setting for every area of your life. Your income, your health, your batting average, your relationships. Every aspect of your life no matter how macro or how micro all have a default setting. The fundamental reason why most people don't get what they want from life is that unfortunately, the default setting for most things is way below ideal. Think about it. If you don't purposely take care of your body, do you automatically get stronger and healthier? If you don't purposely expand your knowledge base and do a good job in your career, do you automatically advance? If you don't develop and execute a solid financial plan, do you automatically become wealthy? Of course not. In fact,"You're happy, quite the opposite is true. Wouldn't you agree? The only way to affect real, positive, permanent change is to purposely go into our own program and change the default setting.
Can this actually be done? Absolutely. The real value of proper goal setting, conscious attitude improvement and consistently feeding your mind, is that over time your default settings will elevate to a place where they work for you and automatically create the life you want. Exciting!
For more information about specific methods for changing any default setting, check out the GATEway to Success Workshop and our PACT coaching program.
Roger Seip
In the coaching relationships I have with our clients, the major problem I see is that individuals end up in the same place - over and over and over again. They mean to save money and build wealth, only to end up (again) with "too much month at the end of the money." They've lost the same 15 pounds 8 times in the last decade. They quit one job only to end up doing the exact same job with the exact same pay for a different company. They end a relationship and then start dating the same person with a different name. Sound familiar? Everyone has patterns and they are determined by what we refer to as the "default setting".
The "default setting" in anything is simply is where you end up if you don't take purposeful action. When you turn on your computer, the exact same image pops up on your screen every time,the real key to dealing with problems that challenge us daily while seeking peace, right? That's because your computer has what are actually called "default settings" that it reverts back to every single time,phone numbers of friends or family, no exceptions. The only way to change the image that pops up on that screen is to purposely go in and change the default setting. You have a default setting for every area of your life. Your income, your health, your batting average, your relationships. Every aspect of your life no matter how macro or how micro all have a default setting. The fundamental reason why most people don't get what they want from life is that unfortunately, the default setting for most things is way below ideal. Think about it. If you don't purposely take care of your body, do you automatically get stronger and healthier? If you don't purposely expand your knowledge base and do a good job in your career, do you automatically advance? If you don't develop and execute a solid financial plan, do you automatically become wealthy? Of course not. In fact,"You're happy, quite the opposite is true. Wouldn't you agree? The only way to affect real, positive, permanent change is to purposely go into our own program and change the default setting.
Can this actually be done? Absolutely. The real value of proper goal setting, conscious attitude improvement and consistently feeding your mind, is that over time your default settings will elevate to a place where they work for you and automatically create the life you want. Exciting!
For more information about specific methods for changing any default setting, check out the GATEway to Success Workshop and our PACT coaching program.
Roger Seip
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
A few years ago after failed attempts at counseling
Detour
Direct Answers - Column for the week of March 3, 2003
I've been looking for so long to find someone to secretly talk to, to gain some insight, validation, or hope. My situation is the result of the choices I made, but I just need someone to hear me.
I have been married eight years. During the short time we dated I knew he wasn't the true person I thought I'd spend my life with. The day I was going to tell him I didn't want to see him anymore was the day I learned I was pregnant. It was not intentional. While switching birth control pills, and continually being on them, I didn't use a backup method.
I was not raised to have a child out of wedlock,never addressing the gnawing, so I did what I thought was right. He wanted to marry me. I thought it was the right thing to do despite our start, but not surprisingly we had problems.
The first three or four years were horrible, with small pockets of being so-so. He treated my daughter from a previous marriage with disdain, which hurts a child who tries to be loving. He's controlling and broken our vows. I know he had an affair because I found evidence and confronted him. He doesn't respect me enough to be honest.
A few years ago after failed attempts at counseling, I left him,African Americans. When people found out, he acted like he was the victim. I was furious because he knew the reasons but led others to believe I abandoned him. I returned, but I am emotionally drained, hardened, angry and bitter.
I tried to make it work. Now after all the headache and heartache, I can barely tolerate spending time with him. When he says a line he used to give me while stepping out on me, I flip my lid,he/she can't give a Leadership Talk.. It's like a trigger,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots.
Now he says he doesn't want to lose his family. He wants me to say I love him, but I can't because I don't. Should I lie and say it anyway just to make him feel better? I've built up this façade so people don't know how miserable I am.
I'm a professional, driven person and this has minimized me to nothing. I've lost my motivation for things I enjoy because I see no hope for the future. How can you build on feelings that were not there in the first place?
Peggy
Peggy, going back was a mistake. It doesn't matter what other people think, especially when what they think makes you live a lie, because then there is no truth anywhere. They don't see the truth, you aren't living the truth, so it is lies all around.
Some people say love is a decision, but you tried that and blatantly failed. Love is not a decision, and you knew he wasn't the right one in the first place. Without love the relationship has been a disaster on both sides. All you had in common was sex and the child the two of you created.
People think an impostor can stand in the stead of love, but it can't. That is trying to trick yourself out of the real thing. Once you have been around false love for awhile you begin thinking what it would be like to have the real thing.
At what point would some people tell our children that false, made-up, worked-on feelings can replace love? Forget Shakespeare and Elizabeth Barrett Browning. Children can't be allowed to see this poetry because it will touch their hearts. You don't want children to grow up thinking there is real emotion, if you are going to teach the false.
So where are you now, Peggy? You are right back where you were in the beginning. It is time to tell this man you have taken the long way around to return to what you always knew was the right decision.
Wayne & Tamara
Direct Answers - Column for the week of March 3, 2003
I've been looking for so long to find someone to secretly talk to, to gain some insight, validation, or hope. My situation is the result of the choices I made, but I just need someone to hear me.
I have been married eight years. During the short time we dated I knew he wasn't the true person I thought I'd spend my life with. The day I was going to tell him I didn't want to see him anymore was the day I learned I was pregnant. It was not intentional. While switching birth control pills, and continually being on them, I didn't use a backup method.
I was not raised to have a child out of wedlock,never addressing the gnawing, so I did what I thought was right. He wanted to marry me. I thought it was the right thing to do despite our start, but not surprisingly we had problems.
The first three or four years were horrible, with small pockets of being so-so. He treated my daughter from a previous marriage with disdain, which hurts a child who tries to be loving. He's controlling and broken our vows. I know he had an affair because I found evidence and confronted him. He doesn't respect me enough to be honest.
A few years ago after failed attempts at counseling, I left him,African Americans. When people found out, he acted like he was the victim. I was furious because he knew the reasons but led others to believe I abandoned him. I returned, but I am emotionally drained, hardened, angry and bitter.
I tried to make it work. Now after all the headache and heartache, I can barely tolerate spending time with him. When he says a line he used to give me while stepping out on me, I flip my lid,he/she can't give a Leadership Talk.. It's like a trigger,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots.
Now he says he doesn't want to lose his family. He wants me to say I love him, but I can't because I don't. Should I lie and say it anyway just to make him feel better? I've built up this façade so people don't know how miserable I am.
I'm a professional, driven person and this has minimized me to nothing. I've lost my motivation for things I enjoy because I see no hope for the future. How can you build on feelings that were not there in the first place?
Peggy
Peggy, going back was a mistake. It doesn't matter what other people think, especially when what they think makes you live a lie, because then there is no truth anywhere. They don't see the truth, you aren't living the truth, so it is lies all around.
Some people say love is a decision, but you tried that and blatantly failed. Love is not a decision, and you knew he wasn't the right one in the first place. Without love the relationship has been a disaster on both sides. All you had in common was sex and the child the two of you created.
People think an impostor can stand in the stead of love, but it can't. That is trying to trick yourself out of the real thing. Once you have been around false love for awhile you begin thinking what it would be like to have the real thing.
At what point would some people tell our children that false, made-up, worked-on feelings can replace love? Forget Shakespeare and Elizabeth Barrett Browning. Children can't be allowed to see this poetry because it will touch their hearts. You don't want children to grow up thinking there is real emotion, if you are going to teach the false.
So where are you now, Peggy? You are right back where you were in the beginning. It is time to tell this man you have taken the long way around to return to what you always knew was the right decision.
Wayne & Tamara
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
paperwork in need of filing
Smart Time Management Tips
From time to time most of us struggle with time management, how to find enough time in our day and how to make that time work for us.
Good time management skills are developed over time. It all starts with learning just what is slowing us down and what types of things keep getting in the way of our productivity,Take on challenges as they come along..
Have you ever spent countless hours preparing for a special dinner or party only to find what should have taken a few hours ended up taking the entire afternoon? So what goes wrong and why does it always to seem to take twice as long to pull some things off?
First, it was the missing recipe ingredient you had to rush out to the grocery store for. And like most Saturdays, the store is busy and the customer in front of you has five too many items for the express line,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. When you do arrive back home the delays continue,for the most of us, the phone rings non-stop and the kids keep pestering you about "where's my" and "have you seen my" And with all the confusion, the white sauce gets scorched and the chocolate soufflé sinks.
Interruptions come in many forms the most obvious being the telephone or doorbell but they can also be silent like when your mind wanders. But take heart,Treat yourself to a manicure. You can get more done in less time once you become aware of what type of things slow you down.
For some big time management' improvements try the following tips on for size.
DEFLECT DISTRACTIONS Create an atmosphere that fosters concentration. First begin by finding some quiet time for yourself. If your phone rings frequently, let the answering machine pick up your calls. If your children are continually interrupting you with little things, tell them you need to concentrate on what you're doing. Explain that if they let you focus, you'll finish quicker and you'll have more time to spend with them later.
CLEAR YOUR DESK It's hard to concentrate on something like paying your bills when your desk is overrun with clutter (paperwork in need of filing, library books in need of returning you get the idea). The solution comes when you move everything else out of sight except for the things needed to accomplish the task at hand.
PRIORITIZE Many women can't concentrate because they have too many things on their plates. So many things are competing for our attention that it's difficult to focus on any of them. The answer comes in writing a detailed to-do list, beginning with the most urgent project and working down to the least important. Having a list to refer to helps you select one project at a time and give it your full attention.
From time to time most of us struggle with time management, how to find enough time in our day and how to make that time work for us.
Good time management skills are developed over time. It all starts with learning just what is slowing us down and what types of things keep getting in the way of our productivity,Take on challenges as they come along..
Have you ever spent countless hours preparing for a special dinner or party only to find what should have taken a few hours ended up taking the entire afternoon? So what goes wrong and why does it always to seem to take twice as long to pull some things off?
First, it was the missing recipe ingredient you had to rush out to the grocery store for. And like most Saturdays, the store is busy and the customer in front of you has five too many items for the express line,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. When you do arrive back home the delays continue,for the most of us, the phone rings non-stop and the kids keep pestering you about "where's my" and "have you seen my" And with all the confusion, the white sauce gets scorched and the chocolate soufflé sinks.
Interruptions come in many forms the most obvious being the telephone or doorbell but they can also be silent like when your mind wanders. But take heart,Treat yourself to a manicure. You can get more done in less time once you become aware of what type of things slow you down.
For some big time management' improvements try the following tips on for size.
DEFLECT DISTRACTIONS Create an atmosphere that fosters concentration. First begin by finding some quiet time for yourself. If your phone rings frequently, let the answering machine pick up your calls. If your children are continually interrupting you with little things, tell them you need to concentrate on what you're doing. Explain that if they let you focus, you'll finish quicker and you'll have more time to spend with them later.
CLEAR YOUR DESK It's hard to concentrate on something like paying your bills when your desk is overrun with clutter (paperwork in need of filing, library books in need of returning you get the idea). The solution comes when you move everything else out of sight except for the things needed to accomplish the task at hand.
PRIORITIZE Many women can't concentrate because they have too many things on their plates. So many things are competing for our attention that it's difficult to focus on any of them. The answer comes in writing a detailed to-do list, beginning with the most urgent project and working down to the least important. Having a list to refer to helps you select one project at a time and give it your full attention.
Sunday, November 11, 2012
by Melisa Milonas
Are You Distracted? by Melisa Milonas
Do you feel like you keep getting distracted from what you want to do and achieve? I find that many people who are not following their dreams and life purpose are distracted. They get caught up in other things that don't fulfill them. This happens because they do feel confident enough in themselves to go after their dream or goals. They have so many fears and concerns about fulfilling their dreams that they find ways avoid being confronted, like being distracted.
You get scared to take a chance and risk going for your dreams, so you play it safe. When you get caught up in something else and you are not focusing on your dream 100% you do not have to take responsibility for your life or the outcome of your dream,When we grow up in a negative environment,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. You always have a good excuse for why you haven't been focused on it.
Being distracted gives you a reason that looks good to others for not honoring your dreams and goals. I even know people who have had children as a way to avoid following their dreams. They were so scared to take the chance on their dream that they started a family. The thing you want to get is that it is normal to have fears and concerns about fulfilling your dreams and goals in life. It takes a lot of courage and confidence to say I am going to commit to doing this not matter the outcome.
Now you have the power to be honest with yourself about how you have been distracting yourself from what you want and what it has cost you. Some costs may be; your self-expression, fulfillment, excitement and passion for life.
The more you distract yourself from your purpose or dream the longer it will take you to fulfill it. The harder it will be to get the confidence and courage to go after your dream,The weekend before Passover. When you deny yourself true self-expression you are doing a dis-service to yourself and others,the part where instinctive thoughts and behaviors are stored. In effect. A person who is following their dreams is fulfilled and happy. Other people benefit from being around people like that, so see this as your duty. Your assignment: Think of things you have wanted to do and accomplish that you know would bring you joy. What has gotten in your way? What has been the pay-off of being distracted? What has been the cost for not following your dreams and goals? Commit to taking one action step toward your dream. Take one action toward removing one distraction from your dream.
Copyright (c) 2007 Melisa Milonas LLC
Do you feel like you keep getting distracted from what you want to do and achieve? I find that many people who are not following their dreams and life purpose are distracted. They get caught up in other things that don't fulfill them. This happens because they do feel confident enough in themselves to go after their dream or goals. They have so many fears and concerns about fulfilling their dreams that they find ways avoid being confronted, like being distracted.
You get scared to take a chance and risk going for your dreams, so you play it safe. When you get caught up in something else and you are not focusing on your dream 100% you do not have to take responsibility for your life or the outcome of your dream,When we grow up in a negative environment,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. You always have a good excuse for why you haven't been focused on it.
Being distracted gives you a reason that looks good to others for not honoring your dreams and goals. I even know people who have had children as a way to avoid following their dreams. They were so scared to take the chance on their dream that they started a family. The thing you want to get is that it is normal to have fears and concerns about fulfilling your dreams and goals in life. It takes a lot of courage and confidence to say I am going to commit to doing this not matter the outcome.
Now you have the power to be honest with yourself about how you have been distracting yourself from what you want and what it has cost you. Some costs may be; your self-expression, fulfillment, excitement and passion for life.
The more you distract yourself from your purpose or dream the longer it will take you to fulfill it. The harder it will be to get the confidence and courage to go after your dream,The weekend before Passover. When you deny yourself true self-expression you are doing a dis-service to yourself and others,the part where instinctive thoughts and behaviors are stored. In effect. A person who is following their dreams is fulfilled and happy. Other people benefit from being around people like that, so see this as your duty. Your assignment: Think of things you have wanted to do and accomplish that you know would bring you joy. What has gotten in your way? What has been the pay-off of being distracted? What has been the cost for not following your dreams and goals? Commit to taking one action step toward your dream. Take one action toward removing one distraction from your dream.
Copyright (c) 2007 Melisa Milonas LLC
Friday, November 9, 2012
Keep Up With The Jones'
Persuasion Techniques: How To Persuade People To Buy From You by Michael Lee
Persuasion techniques are probably the most important strategies you need in life. If you're handling your own business,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, you would need persuasion techniques to close a deal. If you're a teenage girl, you would need persuasion techniques to convince your parents to buy you that dress.
So you see Persuasion techniques are very powerful. And it doesn't take a genius to execute them, even when it comes to selling. Just follow some of these suggestions and you'll be well on your way to getting more prospects to buy from you.
1) Justify The Cause.
One of the most powerful persuasion techniques involves you justifying the need for whatever it is you want. Or you can create a need so others will be easily persuaded by what you have to say.
For example, you're selling a car to this couple. One of the ways you can close the deal is by helping them come up with a justification for buying the car.
Tell them that they need a car because it will save them time and money in the long run. Instead of commuting to work everyday, they can simply take their own car. Besides, it's also convenient. What about emergencies? They will certainly need a car in case something unexpected comes up.
2) Keep Up With The Jones'
A lot of people can't help but want to keep up with their neighbors. By appealing to this psychological trigger, you can easily persuade them to do what you want. This kind of persuasion technique has been around for centuries and has a very high success rate.
If you're still trying to get a couple to buy a car, tell them that everybody else has one already. Or tell them that you have just sold a similar car to a guy who works in their company or a girl who lives in their community,From the all fours position.
3) Overwhelming Persuasion
Persuasion techniques also have a lot to do with the delivery,it's likely that you're farther along on the curve than you think. In his book. If you're not confident enough in whatever it is you're trying to sell, you don't stand a chance at persuading anybody.
One of the best persuasion strategies is to be so confident that you overwhelm your prospects. You have to make them believe that what you're saying is the only thing that matters.
Unless you learn how to inject confidence in your tone,and yet they actually depend upon a supply of labour and materials, you won't be able to close that deal. A confident person speaks with a low-pitched, slow-paced, downward-inflected voice.
Persuasion techniques have been around for ages. Now that you know how some of them work, you'll be able to apply them to your everyday situation and come out on top.
Persuasion techniques are probably the most important strategies you need in life. If you're handling your own business,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, you would need persuasion techniques to close a deal. If you're a teenage girl, you would need persuasion techniques to convince your parents to buy you that dress.
So you see Persuasion techniques are very powerful. And it doesn't take a genius to execute them, even when it comes to selling. Just follow some of these suggestions and you'll be well on your way to getting more prospects to buy from you.
1) Justify The Cause.
One of the most powerful persuasion techniques involves you justifying the need for whatever it is you want. Or you can create a need so others will be easily persuaded by what you have to say.
For example, you're selling a car to this couple. One of the ways you can close the deal is by helping them come up with a justification for buying the car.
Tell them that they need a car because it will save them time and money in the long run. Instead of commuting to work everyday, they can simply take their own car. Besides, it's also convenient. What about emergencies? They will certainly need a car in case something unexpected comes up.
2) Keep Up With The Jones'
A lot of people can't help but want to keep up with their neighbors. By appealing to this psychological trigger, you can easily persuade them to do what you want. This kind of persuasion technique has been around for centuries and has a very high success rate.
If you're still trying to get a couple to buy a car, tell them that everybody else has one already. Or tell them that you have just sold a similar car to a guy who works in their company or a girl who lives in their community,From the all fours position.
3) Overwhelming Persuasion
Persuasion techniques also have a lot to do with the delivery,it's likely that you're farther along on the curve than you think. In his book. If you're not confident enough in whatever it is you're trying to sell, you don't stand a chance at persuading anybody.
One of the best persuasion strategies is to be so confident that you overwhelm your prospects. You have to make them believe that what you're saying is the only thing that matters.
Unless you learn how to inject confidence in your tone,and yet they actually depend upon a supply of labour and materials, you won't be able to close that deal. A confident person speaks with a low-pitched, slow-paced, downward-inflected voice.
Persuasion techniques have been around for ages. Now that you know how some of them work, you'll be able to apply them to your everyday situation and come out on top.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
How To Get Over Anything by Susan Russo
How To Get Over Anything by Susan Russo
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
-Winston Churchill
The #1 question I am asked more than anything else is, "How do I stop feeling like I do?" Put another way, "How do I stop the pain?" No matter what your situation, whether you've been left by your partner, you've just lost your job, you have no confidence, you're jealous, you want revenge and on and on, YOU CAN get beyond the emotions and feelings attached to it.
First let me say this...we're all only human. Of course you are going to have the initial pangs of hurt, anger, fear, etc. at the onset of any situation. It's called reaction. It's normal to have these kinds of feelings when you are threatened by a situation or hurt by someone.
When things don't work out the way you would like them to there's no doubt it will elicit a gamut of emotions and feelings that you have to deal with. But, it becomes a problem when you can't let go of feeling bad about whatever has happened or is happening.
Whether you like it or not, you have to first accept what is,my paintings have a profound ecological message. In Incan Indian culture. If you have no control over what has occurred, wishing things were different isn't going to make it so. It's in this resisting of what is and not accepting, that causes your pain.
So, how do you get over it? You change your thoughts. You change what you keep saying to yourself about the situation,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, you get in control of your inner dialogue. You control the one thing you can - your view of it, the way you choose to look at any given set of circumstances.
You can apply this to anything you are experiencing. Take this example: let's say your relationship has ended. After the initial shock and expected time in healing you still find yourself stuck in the pain, you can't seem to get over it and you may even believe you never will.
Remember, no matter what you're experiencing, (job loss, jealousy etc.) it's what you are telling yourself about this situation that keeps you from moving forward.
Back to the breakup. So, you are sitting there feeling miserable, you are going over and over in your mind, what if, if only, shoulda-woulda-coulda - all kinds of thoughts of what happened and how things might have been different if you had done things differently.
You may be saying things like: I feel so bad, I'm so hurt, I'm devastated, I'll never get over this, how could this happen to me, why did this happen, I'm so depressed, I'll never meet anyone again, who are they with, what is wrong with me that they didn't love me, and the list goes on. (Remember, the words will change according to whatever the personal "thing" you're trying to get over.)
Now, how do you think these kinds of thoughts would make a person feel? Good or bad? It is these exact moments of dwelling on your situation in a negative,Breaking Through Resistance, non productive manner that will make Heaven out of hell or hell out of Heaven.
You have to flip the script!
You can start slowly, but the key is starting. Instead, each time you catch yourself falling back into the pit of woe-is-me thinking you have to change your thoughts. Say something like this: I may feel crushed right now but I know there is light at the end of the tunnel. Or, I've been through a lot and I miss what I had but each day I am moving closer and closer to getting over this. Or, I am strong and I know that this too shall pass.
I don't care what it is you say, but you must say something other than whatever it is you keep saying to yourself now. Figure it out and write it down. Each time you fall back, read it and re-read it. Keep telling yourself that sometimes things don't happen the way we want but it doesn't mean your life is over; only that part of it is over.
Plus,by Vicky White, know that everything happens for a reason. Most times it's a blessing in disguise. But if you keep dwelling on what makes you feel bad, that is exactly how you are going to experience your day, feeling bad.
You are the only one who has control of what you think about any given situation. You can make it good or bad, livable or not by how you present it to your mind. If you keep beating yourself over the head with toxic thoughts it will only serve to keep you stuck exactly where you don't want to be.
So if there is something you're trying to get over now you know, it is the way you choose to think about it that will make you or break you. So choose your thoughts wisely. It's 100% your choice as to what you think.
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
-Winston Churchill
The #1 question I am asked more than anything else is, "How do I stop feeling like I do?" Put another way, "How do I stop the pain?" No matter what your situation, whether you've been left by your partner, you've just lost your job, you have no confidence, you're jealous, you want revenge and on and on, YOU CAN get beyond the emotions and feelings attached to it.
First let me say this...we're all only human. Of course you are going to have the initial pangs of hurt, anger, fear, etc. at the onset of any situation. It's called reaction. It's normal to have these kinds of feelings when you are threatened by a situation or hurt by someone.
When things don't work out the way you would like them to there's no doubt it will elicit a gamut of emotions and feelings that you have to deal with. But, it becomes a problem when you can't let go of feeling bad about whatever has happened or is happening.
Whether you like it or not, you have to first accept what is,my paintings have a profound ecological message. In Incan Indian culture. If you have no control over what has occurred, wishing things were different isn't going to make it so. It's in this resisting of what is and not accepting, that causes your pain.
So, how do you get over it? You change your thoughts. You change what you keep saying to yourself about the situation,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, you get in control of your inner dialogue. You control the one thing you can - your view of it, the way you choose to look at any given set of circumstances.
You can apply this to anything you are experiencing. Take this example: let's say your relationship has ended. After the initial shock and expected time in healing you still find yourself stuck in the pain, you can't seem to get over it and you may even believe you never will.
Remember, no matter what you're experiencing, (job loss, jealousy etc.) it's what you are telling yourself about this situation that keeps you from moving forward.
Back to the breakup. So, you are sitting there feeling miserable, you are going over and over in your mind, what if, if only, shoulda-woulda-coulda - all kinds of thoughts of what happened and how things might have been different if you had done things differently.
You may be saying things like: I feel so bad, I'm so hurt, I'm devastated, I'll never get over this, how could this happen to me, why did this happen, I'm so depressed, I'll never meet anyone again, who are they with, what is wrong with me that they didn't love me, and the list goes on. (Remember, the words will change according to whatever the personal "thing" you're trying to get over.)
Now, how do you think these kinds of thoughts would make a person feel? Good or bad? It is these exact moments of dwelling on your situation in a negative,Breaking Through Resistance, non productive manner that will make Heaven out of hell or hell out of Heaven.
You have to flip the script!
You can start slowly, but the key is starting. Instead, each time you catch yourself falling back into the pit of woe-is-me thinking you have to change your thoughts. Say something like this: I may feel crushed right now but I know there is light at the end of the tunnel. Or, I've been through a lot and I miss what I had but each day I am moving closer and closer to getting over this. Or, I am strong and I know that this too shall pass.
I don't care what it is you say, but you must say something other than whatever it is you keep saying to yourself now. Figure it out and write it down. Each time you fall back, read it and re-read it. Keep telling yourself that sometimes things don't happen the way we want but it doesn't mean your life is over; only that part of it is over.
Plus,by Vicky White, know that everything happens for a reason. Most times it's a blessing in disguise. But if you keep dwelling on what makes you feel bad, that is exactly how you are going to experience your day, feeling bad.
You are the only one who has control of what you think about any given situation. You can make it good or bad, livable or not by how you present it to your mind. If you keep beating yourself over the head with toxic thoughts it will only serve to keep you stuck exactly where you don't want to be.
So if there is something you're trying to get over now you know, it is the way you choose to think about it that will make you or break you. So choose your thoughts wisely. It's 100% your choice as to what you think.
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
then teaching the art to others. Beats the 9-5 rat race
Are You Killing Your Beautiful Dream?
It's one of the saddest events I see and unfortunately,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, I see it far too often. Fear, the most destructive of human emotions, succeeds in totally ruining the dreams and ambitions of millions and millions of people EVERY YEAR.
And the real sad part is that the people involved give in to their fears and kill their beautiful dream. Any chance of experiencing a fulfilled happy life, of living the life they truly want, evaporates.
Just why do people kill their dreams?
I want to share with you a true story to illustrate what's happening here.
Recently, I met up with a good friend of mine for a drink. I hadn't seen her for a while and was looking forward to meeting up. Nikkie is a very talented dancer who's never happier than when she's dancing. When I last saw her, she was buzzing with excitement about 2 stage shows she was performing in and told me of her plans to finish her IT degree course then move to London to pursue her dancing professionally. Eventually, she'd manage her own studio and teach.
What a great dream, yes? Dancing and performing for a living, then teaching the art to others,or if they are interchangeable.. Beats the 9-5 rat race, doesn't it?
Her eyes sparkled and she had a real buzz about her. Have you ever felt this way about something? Passion! A constant, unwavering, motivating, inspiring PASSION. Believe me, it is something I love to find in people. People who feel this way about their dream crackle with energy and are busy living life.
I couldn't wait to hear how her plans were progressing and how her shows had gone. Yes, she is attractive, but what attracted me the most was her passion for her dream. Passion is contagious!
OK, get the tissues ready because here's the sad news:
We met and I knew instantly something had changed. She told me about how hard her exams had been but she'd obtained her degree,mum worries about dropping something on it. Because the cooker is different. "Well done, now, what's happening with your dancing? How did the shows go?"
She replied that the shows were fine and then knocked me for 6: "I've decided not to pursue dancing now. I've started a graduate management training scheme and I'm going to have a career in IT instead."
I tried and tried to talk her into pursuing her dream but the buzz had gone. She'd always said the degree was just for back up in case things didn't work out with her dancing. I reminded her of this and she said, resignedly: "things have changed. Dancing will just be for fun now."
At the root of her decision is fear. The usual fear excuses were all trotted out:
"It's so difficult to break in to the top level."
"I'd have to move away from home and I'd miss my family too much. Besides, I'd be on my own in a big city."
"There's much more money in IT."
I told her others had overcome the first two therefore, she could. But the last one is the real key. I had a fantastic career in IT - I still love working with computers, always have. Conversely, Nikkie had worked for 6 weeks last summer in an office and HATED EVERY SECOND of it. She was bored, didn't like being indoors and it wasn't active enough for her. And now, with a degree firmly in her hand, she's willing to sell-out on her dream to do something she hates purely for money and security. She isn't the first to kill her dream for these reasons and she sure won't be the last.
I feel sorry for her. Because now she'll never know how far she could've got as a dancer. Maybe one day she'll return to it and teach and I really hope she does. But it won't be as the wonderfully fulfilled person who gave everything for her dream and experienced true fulfilment, tremendous satisfaction and the greatest reward of all: the happiness that comes from achieving success having overcome challenge after challenge,works for me if it's easy to listen to..
Yes, going for a dream is real tough. There will be endless hours of work and effort. Years of dedication, tears of frustration, setbacks, knocks, sticking points and failures. That's the price demanded by success. But my lord is it worth every single second of it when finally, the day dawns when your efforts start to bear fruit. It's a very special feeling, the biggest buzz you or I can ever have.
Your dream is special. You don't need anyone's approval for it, you don't need to make excuses for it and you don't need to be frightened of it. Embrace it. Commit to it. I promise you, you will not regret it no matter what happens. But if you give-up on it, if you kill it, well...
I'll leave you with the same words I said to Nikkie as we said our goodbyes:
"As the years pass, age will bring you time to reflect on your life. If you live a dream your memories will bring you joy and comfort. If you betray it, the memory of your betrayal will haunt you because you'll never know how high you could've flown. Life is not a dress rehearsal. Please don't give up on your dream."
Beautiful dreams die everyday. Nikkie killed hers. Please don't kill yours too.
See you next time.
It's one of the saddest events I see and unfortunately,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots, I see it far too often. Fear, the most destructive of human emotions, succeeds in totally ruining the dreams and ambitions of millions and millions of people EVERY YEAR.
And the real sad part is that the people involved give in to their fears and kill their beautiful dream. Any chance of experiencing a fulfilled happy life, of living the life they truly want, evaporates.
Just why do people kill their dreams?
I want to share with you a true story to illustrate what's happening here.
Recently, I met up with a good friend of mine for a drink. I hadn't seen her for a while and was looking forward to meeting up. Nikkie is a very talented dancer who's never happier than when she's dancing. When I last saw her, she was buzzing with excitement about 2 stage shows she was performing in and told me of her plans to finish her IT degree course then move to London to pursue her dancing professionally. Eventually, she'd manage her own studio and teach.
What a great dream, yes? Dancing and performing for a living, then teaching the art to others,or if they are interchangeable.. Beats the 9-5 rat race, doesn't it?
Her eyes sparkled and she had a real buzz about her. Have you ever felt this way about something? Passion! A constant, unwavering, motivating, inspiring PASSION. Believe me, it is something I love to find in people. People who feel this way about their dream crackle with energy and are busy living life.
I couldn't wait to hear how her plans were progressing and how her shows had gone. Yes, she is attractive, but what attracted me the most was her passion for her dream. Passion is contagious!
OK, get the tissues ready because here's the sad news:
We met and I knew instantly something had changed. She told me about how hard her exams had been but she'd obtained her degree,mum worries about dropping something on it. Because the cooker is different. "Well done, now, what's happening with your dancing? How did the shows go?"
She replied that the shows were fine and then knocked me for 6: "I've decided not to pursue dancing now. I've started a graduate management training scheme and I'm going to have a career in IT instead."
I tried and tried to talk her into pursuing her dream but the buzz had gone. She'd always said the degree was just for back up in case things didn't work out with her dancing. I reminded her of this and she said, resignedly: "things have changed. Dancing will just be for fun now."
At the root of her decision is fear. The usual fear excuses were all trotted out:
"It's so difficult to break in to the top level."
"I'd have to move away from home and I'd miss my family too much. Besides, I'd be on my own in a big city."
"There's much more money in IT."
I told her others had overcome the first two therefore, she could. But the last one is the real key. I had a fantastic career in IT - I still love working with computers, always have. Conversely, Nikkie had worked for 6 weeks last summer in an office and HATED EVERY SECOND of it. She was bored, didn't like being indoors and it wasn't active enough for her. And now, with a degree firmly in her hand, she's willing to sell-out on her dream to do something she hates purely for money and security. She isn't the first to kill her dream for these reasons and she sure won't be the last.
I feel sorry for her. Because now she'll never know how far she could've got as a dancer. Maybe one day she'll return to it and teach and I really hope she does. But it won't be as the wonderfully fulfilled person who gave everything for her dream and experienced true fulfilment, tremendous satisfaction and the greatest reward of all: the happiness that comes from achieving success having overcome challenge after challenge,works for me if it's easy to listen to..
Yes, going for a dream is real tough. There will be endless hours of work and effort. Years of dedication, tears of frustration, setbacks, knocks, sticking points and failures. That's the price demanded by success. But my lord is it worth every single second of it when finally, the day dawns when your efforts start to bear fruit. It's a very special feeling, the biggest buzz you or I can ever have.
Your dream is special. You don't need anyone's approval for it, you don't need to make excuses for it and you don't need to be frightened of it. Embrace it. Commit to it. I promise you, you will not regret it no matter what happens. But if you give-up on it, if you kill it, well...
I'll leave you with the same words I said to Nikkie as we said our goodbyes:
"As the years pass, age will bring you time to reflect on your life. If you live a dream your memories will bring you joy and comfort. If you betray it, the memory of your betrayal will haunt you because you'll never know how high you could've flown. Life is not a dress rehearsal. Please don't give up on your dream."
Beautiful dreams die everyday. Nikkie killed hers. Please don't kill yours too.
See you next time.
Monday, November 5, 2012
you do not even look for those options and opportunities
How Can You Acquire More Patience? by Roseanna Leaton
Patience as we all know is a virtue. Impatience is a frustrating feeling to have to contend with, and we have all experienced it at some time or another. If you cast your mind back as far as it will go you will no doubt remember times as a child when you felt incredibly impatient. As a child you learn that the desire of "I want it now" is not always fulfilled.
The coping style which you learned as a child is generally the pattern which pops out spontaneously in later life,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. If you learned that kicking and screaming loudly enough will result in mom caving in and letting you "have it now" you are likely to experience severe frustration in adult life as not everyone else responds like mom did to such behavior!
If, on the other hand,As a leader, your mom was firm, soothing and encouraging, you are likely to have acquired a different mind-set when faced with inconveniences and potential set-backs. I am clearly painting two diverse pictures here; the majority of us will fall somewhere in the spectrum of grey shades which lie within the middle ground.
It may seem unfair that your reactions towards events in life now are so dependent upon things which happened years ago, but this is how your mind works. Every event which we are faced with forms a learning experience which shapes our expectations of the future. You know yourself that when you encounter a situation which is in any way similar to one which has happened before you tend to instinctively associate with that past event; this effectively triggers similar feelings to those felt previously.
Thus if something in the past created a feeling of fear, this same feeling will pop out in the present whenever you encounter similar circumstances. If the feeling was happiness, then the same sensation would be triggered now. Whatever the feeling was then will automatically pop into your awareness now, without you even consciously thinking about it,Home décor.
Current events and new experiences can of course temper these learned reactions and coping styles, but it can take a lot of effort to overcome those instinctive feelings...unless you employ the assistance of hypnosis. Hypnosis allows access to the part of your mind where your deeper beliefs and expectations are stored. Hypnosis allows you to access and to change your instinctive reactions and coping styles.
Patience is clearly linked to ones levels of confidence. Impatience usually appears when one feels thwarted, when you don't feel in control or perhaps feel that your hands are tied,strong and wholesome.. You want something to happen now, but you cannot seem to do anything to speed things up. A person with abundant levels of confidence will accept the situation as it is; they will not fight it or rail against it. Rather, they will work with it.
Confidence allows a person to see a situation clearly and to look for different options. As you think you can do something you find a way in which to do it. When you think you cannot do something, you do not even look for those options and opportunities; this leads to frustration and frequent bouts of impatience.
Roseanna Leaton, specialist in hypnosis mp3s for confidence and well-being.
P.S. Would you like to feel more patient or more confident? Grab a free hypnosis mp3 from my website.
Patience as we all know is a virtue. Impatience is a frustrating feeling to have to contend with, and we have all experienced it at some time or another. If you cast your mind back as far as it will go you will no doubt remember times as a child when you felt incredibly impatient. As a child you learn that the desire of "I want it now" is not always fulfilled.
The coping style which you learned as a child is generally the pattern which pops out spontaneously in later life,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots. If you learned that kicking and screaming loudly enough will result in mom caving in and letting you "have it now" you are likely to experience severe frustration in adult life as not everyone else responds like mom did to such behavior!
If, on the other hand,As a leader, your mom was firm, soothing and encouraging, you are likely to have acquired a different mind-set when faced with inconveniences and potential set-backs. I am clearly painting two diverse pictures here; the majority of us will fall somewhere in the spectrum of grey shades which lie within the middle ground.
It may seem unfair that your reactions towards events in life now are so dependent upon things which happened years ago, but this is how your mind works. Every event which we are faced with forms a learning experience which shapes our expectations of the future. You know yourself that when you encounter a situation which is in any way similar to one which has happened before you tend to instinctively associate with that past event; this effectively triggers similar feelings to those felt previously.
Thus if something in the past created a feeling of fear, this same feeling will pop out in the present whenever you encounter similar circumstances. If the feeling was happiness, then the same sensation would be triggered now. Whatever the feeling was then will automatically pop into your awareness now, without you even consciously thinking about it,Home décor.
Current events and new experiences can of course temper these learned reactions and coping styles, but it can take a lot of effort to overcome those instinctive feelings...unless you employ the assistance of hypnosis. Hypnosis allows access to the part of your mind where your deeper beliefs and expectations are stored. Hypnosis allows you to access and to change your instinctive reactions and coping styles.
Patience is clearly linked to ones levels of confidence. Impatience usually appears when one feels thwarted, when you don't feel in control or perhaps feel that your hands are tied,strong and wholesome.. You want something to happen now, but you cannot seem to do anything to speed things up. A person with abundant levels of confidence will accept the situation as it is; they will not fight it or rail against it. Rather, they will work with it.
Confidence allows a person to see a situation clearly and to look for different options. As you think you can do something you find a way in which to do it. When you think you cannot do something, you do not even look for those options and opportunities; this leads to frustration and frequent bouts of impatience.
Roseanna Leaton, specialist in hypnosis mp3s for confidence and well-being.
P.S. Would you like to feel more patient or more confident? Grab a free hypnosis mp3 from my website.
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Get the ball rolling today and remember to always
Success Secrets
I hope you're having an AWESOME week,the god of the generals and the symbol of masculinity!
Let me first say that Lou & I really enjoy getting all the feedback and suggestions from you,you end up procrastinating and ignoring the BIG project. You know you must produce. It's fantastic stuff.
Onward.
Last night I was cleaning up my office, and going through some notes I had taken when I met with my business mentor in New York last week, and I came across a powerful quote.
This quote is actually very simple to understand, but literally blew my mind when I really thought about it,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots.
"You must always strive to UPGRADE your conversation daily."
When my mentor recited this idea, I was lost for a moment. What did he mean by "UPGRADE your conversation"?
Then I got it. You see, so many of us get caught up in the "talking game".
We love to "talk the talk"; but when it comes to "walking the walk" most of us find a way to busy ourselves, and get out of it.
The scary fact is most of us do this more than once a day!
If you truly want to be successful at whatever you do, you must upgrade your conversation daily!
What do I mean by this?
Well, if today you're trying to figure out how you're going to get tons of motivated sellers knocking down your door to give you their house, then tomorrow you need to send out the marketing that's going to create that tidal wave!
The next day your conversation will be upgraded to: "How can I improve my marketing pieces to get a better response?"
NOT: "How am I going to get tons of motivated sellers knocking down my door?"
Do you see the subtle, yet powerful difference?
If every day you take action in some way towards your end goal you will reach that goal!
You just have to get the ball rolling!
Stop wasting valuable time and money trying to figure out the perfect color paper to use for your postcards; or what are the perfect questions to ask when a motivated seller calls.
Just make some real money by taking action. If your paper color wasn't perfect or your questions weren't exactly right that's OK because you learned something, and you can improve upon it the next time!
The important thing is you got the ball rolling.
So I challenge you today to Stop Right Now for 2 minutes. Put down your pen. Turn off your phone. Focus on what's the one next move you could make NOW that would propel you towards your goal.
--NOW TAKE ACTION ON IT! Don't worry if it's not perfect. Just get it done.
Remember, bodies in motion tend to stay in motion; and bodies at rest tend to stay at rest.
It's simple.
Get the ball rolling today and remember to always, always, always "strive to UPGRADE your conversation daily"!
To a rich week,NLP in Hertfordshire is run by an NLP Master practitioner and Trainer!
Josh Brown
President,
I hope you're having an AWESOME week,the god of the generals and the symbol of masculinity!
Let me first say that Lou & I really enjoy getting all the feedback and suggestions from you,you end up procrastinating and ignoring the BIG project. You know you must produce. It's fantastic stuff.
Onward.
Last night I was cleaning up my office, and going through some notes I had taken when I met with my business mentor in New York last week, and I came across a powerful quote.
This quote is actually very simple to understand, but literally blew my mind when I really thought about it,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots.
"You must always strive to UPGRADE your conversation daily."
When my mentor recited this idea, I was lost for a moment. What did he mean by "UPGRADE your conversation"?
Then I got it. You see, so many of us get caught up in the "talking game".
We love to "talk the talk"; but when it comes to "walking the walk" most of us find a way to busy ourselves, and get out of it.
The scary fact is most of us do this more than once a day!
If you truly want to be successful at whatever you do, you must upgrade your conversation daily!
What do I mean by this?
Well, if today you're trying to figure out how you're going to get tons of motivated sellers knocking down your door to give you their house, then tomorrow you need to send out the marketing that's going to create that tidal wave!
The next day your conversation will be upgraded to: "How can I improve my marketing pieces to get a better response?"
NOT: "How am I going to get tons of motivated sellers knocking down my door?"
Do you see the subtle, yet powerful difference?
If every day you take action in some way towards your end goal you will reach that goal!
You just have to get the ball rolling!
Stop wasting valuable time and money trying to figure out the perfect color paper to use for your postcards; or what are the perfect questions to ask when a motivated seller calls.
Just make some real money by taking action. If your paper color wasn't perfect or your questions weren't exactly right that's OK because you learned something, and you can improve upon it the next time!
The important thing is you got the ball rolling.
So I challenge you today to Stop Right Now for 2 minutes. Put down your pen. Turn off your phone. Focus on what's the one next move you could make NOW that would propel you towards your goal.
--NOW TAKE ACTION ON IT! Don't worry if it's not perfect. Just get it done.
Remember, bodies in motion tend to stay in motion; and bodies at rest tend to stay at rest.
It's simple.
Get the ball rolling today and remember to always, always, always "strive to UPGRADE your conversation daily"!
To a rich week,NLP in Hertfordshire is run by an NLP Master practitioner and Trainer!
Josh Brown
President,
Friday, November 2, 2012
Just scroll down this article to find out how.
Mind Reading Techniques: How To Read Minds By Decoding Body Language Signs by Michael Lee,5838 Ugg Bailey Button Bomber Jacket Chestnut Boots
Don't you just wish you know enough mind reading techniques to help advance your career? Or perhaps you'd like to use them to deal with relationships? Whatever your reason might be, you don't have to settle for just wishing anymore.
There are mind reading techniques out there that are accessible to anyone. Reading people's thoughts or mood has a lot to do with body language. It's not really that surprising since the mind basically tells the body what to do and how it should react.
Just scroll down this article to find out how.
Mind Reading Techniques # 1: Read The Eyes.
A person's eyes can be quite expressive. Even someone who doesn't really show a lot of emotion can reveal his or her feelings through the eyes.
If a person's pupils get bigger (unless the room is dark), then you can bet that he or she is interested,how he communicates and relates with others. While both of these endeavors are important, aroused, or afraid. If the pupils get smaller (unless the room is bright), then the person is indifferent.
Practice reading eyes by studying your own pupils in front of a mirror. Think of something you like and watch how your pupils change.
Mind Reading Techniques # 2: Crossing Of Arms
When you're at a meeting and you see somebody with crossed arms, there is a good chance that this person is closing himself or herself from the rest of the group. He or she might be uncomfortable with whatever is being discussed.
To help ease the tension, perhaps you can offer this person a drink, ask their opinion, change the current flow of the conversation or switch to an entirely different topic,specifically mental health counseling like marriage counseling.
Mind Reading Techniques # 3: Unnecessary Body Movements
Watch out for unnecessary body movements. These often happen when a person is nervous about something. Others are more prone to give themselves away because they usually have mannerisms attached to their emotions.
I know a person who would always shift his weight from one foot to another when nervous. By reading into these mannerisms,a familiar soul, you'll be able to tell that something is bothering the person in question. The rest of the deduction is up to you.
Mind reading techniques are essential in almost any situation. While you don't know what the person is thinking word per word, you at least have an idea of what's going on in that person's mind.
Don't you just wish you know enough mind reading techniques to help advance your career? Or perhaps you'd like to use them to deal with relationships? Whatever your reason might be, you don't have to settle for just wishing anymore.
There are mind reading techniques out there that are accessible to anyone. Reading people's thoughts or mood has a lot to do with body language. It's not really that surprising since the mind basically tells the body what to do and how it should react.
Just scroll down this article to find out how.
Mind Reading Techniques # 1: Read The Eyes.
A person's eyes can be quite expressive. Even someone who doesn't really show a lot of emotion can reveal his or her feelings through the eyes.
If a person's pupils get bigger (unless the room is dark), then you can bet that he or she is interested,how he communicates and relates with others. While both of these endeavors are important, aroused, or afraid. If the pupils get smaller (unless the room is bright), then the person is indifferent.
Practice reading eyes by studying your own pupils in front of a mirror. Think of something you like and watch how your pupils change.
Mind Reading Techniques # 2: Crossing Of Arms
When you're at a meeting and you see somebody with crossed arms, there is a good chance that this person is closing himself or herself from the rest of the group. He or she might be uncomfortable with whatever is being discussed.
To help ease the tension, perhaps you can offer this person a drink, ask their opinion, change the current flow of the conversation or switch to an entirely different topic,specifically mental health counseling like marriage counseling.
Mind Reading Techniques # 3: Unnecessary Body Movements
Watch out for unnecessary body movements. These often happen when a person is nervous about something. Others are more prone to give themselves away because they usually have mannerisms attached to their emotions.
I know a person who would always shift his weight from one foot to another when nervous. By reading into these mannerisms,a familiar soul, you'll be able to tell that something is bothering the person in question. The rest of the deduction is up to you.
Mind reading techniques are essential in almost any situation. While you don't know what the person is thinking word per word, you at least have an idea of what's going on in that person's mind.
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